THE GIFT..MY JOURNAL OF QUOTES:***CREATES MIND***

QUOTE:I WHEN I UNDERSTAND..I'M UNDERSTANDING..WHAT THE DREAM FORETELLS ...BECOMES VISION...WHEN ALL THATS GIVEN..I STAND THE TEST OF TIME WRITTEN..THATS CALLED..DISCIPLINE..WISDOM..WELL UNDERSTOOD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUOTE:II WHEN I SORE AMONG YOUR JUPITER 2 GREET YOUR MARS..I CLAIMED SKIES..WHERE CLOUDS FOLLOW...PROTECTS MY WHEREABOUTS...AS FAR AS I CAN GO...GOD MAKES THIS ALL WORTH WHILE..POSSIBLE..PRAISE HIS NAME..WHERE I AM HIS CHILD..FOREVER BLESSED ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUOTE:III WHAT LIGHT THAT SHINES ON MY AFRICAN HABITAT...GIVES COLORS 2 BLEND.. MIXED.AND YET..I ASSOCIATE..WHAT COMPREHENDS FELLOWSHIP..GATHERING BEGINNINGS..WHERE PAIN LEFT IT'S ROOTS..WHERE DA END COMES..AWARDS RAINBOWS..ONE UNIVERSE ONE BEING..OUT OF CONTROL..STILL.. WEARS DEATH.. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ POEM~~~~~~GENTLE SLEEP~~~A WAR STORY~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I DIE..WHERE I NEST REST..BE WEAKEN BY LESS ENERGY..FROM WITHDRAWL..BEING TOSS..TURNED AROUND..LOST HOURS WHICH DISPLAYS FIGURES..KEEPS DANCING IN MY HEAD..WHERE DA ROOM IS AN ARMY..THOUGHTS OF PILLOWS..OLD AND SHALLOW..THE LININGS ARE CAVED IN..WHERE I LOSE COMFORT..MY HEAD IS HURTING..DUE 2 LACK OF CHRONIC BEATIN..ME..LIFTING..ME..WHERE FIGHTING IS WAR..WHAT AIMS..FIRES..DRIFTS APART..FROM LEAVING U ALONE.. WHERE I KILLED NOISE..THE RIGHT WAY..WHATS NORMAL..MAKING LOVE.. WITHOUT AMMUNITION..DESTROYED OUR GENTLE SLEEP..HOME..WHERE DA HEART LIVES..ALL IS FORGIVEN..CREATE/SHEILA T JORDAN..DEC/2008. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUOTE:IV AS I DIP YOUR FLAVA..TASTE YOUR SOUL..WHAT EATS MY INTENTIONS 2..EVOLVE..OPEN PANDORAS BOX..FIND WHATS CHANGES THOUGHT..COMES 2 AN CONCLUSION..CREATE/08 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUOTEV:OBSERVATION I'M A METHOD 2 MINSET..INNER ROUTINE..WHERE PRINCIPLES ARE IN ORDERLY FASHION KEEP MY FOCUS..ALERT FACILITIES..SET THEM ON DA RIGHT TRACK..WHERE MEMORY IS IN CONTROL...CREATE/DEC/2008 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUOTE:VI TO BRIDGE DA GAPS..IS LIKE BREAKING BREAD 2 DIVIDE WHAT RESCUES RECESSION.. PROSPER THOSE IN NEED OF LOSS..CREATE/2008DEC ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ QUOTE:VII MY BLUE ROSE IS NOT JUST A COLOR..BUT DA BEAUTY WORE 2 THE HUMAN EYE IT VIEWS.. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ GOD BLESS YOU FOR ALL THE MONTHS I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON YOUR BEHALF...THANKS AGAIN..LANNIE..TAKE CARE..PEACE ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AN ANSWER 2 POET >PABLO NERULA<

SO..ONCE I AM NOTHING..WE MEET...WHERE..MY HEART TREADS WATER...ON A LAKE OF NONE..WHERE MY SOUL PRETEND THE WEATHER CHANGES 2 SUN..WHERE SKIES HAVE MELTED MY DEEPEST ROSE..WHAT IMAGE WORE...ONCE IN RAGED FROM HOLLOW SLEEP...WHERE LOVE KNOWS NO LIFE..NEVER MET..TO DREAM WHAT FEATURES ME..THE GOLDEN WOMAN OF TIME..WHAT URGES HER BODY TO LIVE BENEATH THE SOUND.. WHAT CAPTURES...A BITE OFF THE TREE WE DEVOURED..TOOK A CHANCE AS STOLEN MOMENTS..LASSO YOUR LOVE AS A ROPE..I TIE YOU UP..THROW MY WEIGHT AROUND YOUR TORSO..COMMENCE 2 DIVE ON..WHAT TRIED 2 ESCAPE FROM LONELY ..DARK TIDES..THAT AIMS AT ME UNSELFISHLY..THOUGH EYES HAVE MET FOR JUST A SEASON OF WOES...WE WERE DRIFTING IN A WORLDPOOL OF NEGLECT..SUFFERING FROM A NEED 2 PROVOKE FUN..I SMILED AS IF U WERE MY LONG AWAITED VICTORY...SPANDING THE GLOBE..SEEKING AN OUTCOME OF FORTUNE..WHERE ONCE MORE ..I DIED..SINKING IN A WORLD WITHOUT TIME..BUT GAVE OURSELVES.2 ONE ANOTHER IN A JOURNEY 2 RESCUE...HEARTS KNOWING ANY..KEEPIN THOUGHT ALIVE AND BREATHIN WHERE THE ADVENTURE..LAID ME DOWN..HID BEHIND..THE ATONEMENT..WHAT BURIED THOUGHT..LOCKING LIPS...TOUCHING IMAGINARY COMFORT..THE JOY WITHIN..DREAMS 2 FOREFILL..LEAVES..SAYS GOODBYE..FAKING..WHAT WAS JUST A NOVEL OF PASSION AND WIT.. WET...WILD..INSANITY..WEARIN YOUR SLEEP..WHAT WAKES UP..ATTEMPTING 2 REMAIN LOVE..WHAT WAS ONLY MAKE BELIEVE..CREATE

OUTCRY LIVES IN OUR CITIES

ANOTHER YEAR HAS GONE...WE LIVE AS ONE..BUT..FOR THE MOMENT I CRY..WHEN RAINBOWS PASS ME BY..WHEN PAIN HAS IT'S DAYS..WHEN HEARTS ARE GASPING FOR HELP..I LOOK TOWARD MY FEDERAL GOVT...TO EASE MY LOST OF GAIN..I'M COLD..WHERE WARMTH HAS CLOSED MY DOORS...WHERE HOME IS NO MORE..I WALK WITH CANDLES..LEAVE WHAT'S LEFT AMONG THE SHADOWS..WHERE WE LIVE..I CAME WITH BAGGAGE..I BEGGED IN HUNGER..I HOLLERED IN PAIN..HOW MUCH MORE CAN I TAKE..I'M A SUBSTANCE OF LABOR..A CHILD UNABLE..I CAN'T PAY NO BILLS..U TAKEN AWAY MY SHELTER..MY RELATIVES CAN'T HELP..FOR LACK OF NEED THEMSELVES..WE LIVE AS POOR AS THE CLOTHES ON OUR BACK..WE SHARE OUR BREAKFAST..ON THE STREETS IN SOUP KITCHENS AND OVERCROWDED ROOMS WITH NO MORE FOOD TO DISTRIBUTE..WHAT'S A HUMAN SUPPOSE TO DO...I GET DOWN ON MY KNEES..AT THE NEAREST CHURCH OR SYNAGOGUES..WHERE PRAYER BECOMES MY ONLY ANSWER..I SEE THE MORNING RISE...HOURS PAVES THE WAY TO SKIES LEAVING DAYLIGHT..MEETS DA DARKNESS B4 I CAN CLEANSE MY BODY..I TAKE A NUMBER..WAIT TO BE CALLED WHERE I REST..MY FAMILY IS IN ANOTHER SHITHOLE...THIS IS THE SEASON TO BE JOLLY...NOT WHERE I LIVE..WITH MISTLETOE AND HOLLY...NO CHRISTMAS CARDS..NO GIFTS UNDER TREES..NO HOT CHOCOLATE OR MIDNIGHT APPAREL..WHERE LIL BABIES..MOTHERS AND FATHERS..WILL BRING IN DA NEW YEAR 2009...JUST ANOTHER YEAR..WHAT LEFT US BROKE..LIVING ON BORROWED TIME..IN A JAR..WITH CHANGE SPARED..I SLEEP IN YOUR ALLEYWAYS..I SHAKE LIKE I'VE NEVER BEEN ACCOMPANIED BY DA SALVATION ARMY..WHAT HELPS LESS IN A MAN OR A WOMAN..WITH LITTLE CHILDREN LEFT IN DARKNESS..WITHOUT A NOTION OF TIME OR EXISTENCE..I CRY FOR ALL WHO ARE HOMELESS..I PLEAD TO MY JESUS..I ASK HIM..IS THEIR ANOTHER WAY TO ESCAPE POVERTY WITHOUT A SOLUTION..IF THERES ANY ROOM LEFT IN THIS WORLD..FOR ME OR ANY LIFESTYLE..SEEKING LOWER THAN AN GRAVE SITE..THAT SPELLS GOODBYE..YOUR TIME IS UP...GOD..IF YA HERE ME..PLEASE ANSWER MY QUEST..TO STAY ALIVE IN THIS LIFE WITH NO RESULTS..PLEASE..AFTER ALL THAT'S WRITTEN TO CONGRESS..PLEASE BRING THE POWERS OF COMMAND...HELP OUR NEW CHIEF IN THE WHITE HOUSE...A BLACKMAN..WITH MUCH LEFT ON HIS HANDS IN HIS JOURNEY..TO SAVE US ALL.. THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA'S PEOPLE..THE RED..THE WHITE AND DA BLUE...I HURTING INSIDE MYSELF..I LOVE MY WIFE..MY CHILDREN..THE ABILITIES WHICH I STAND ACCOUNTABLE..MY FREEDOM 4 WHICH MY BLOOD REIGNS RESPONSIBLE AND STRENGTH YOU GIVES US ALL...TO PROSPER AND REMAIN HUMBLE..WHERE OUR TREE GROWS..WHEN OUR LAND WILL NOURISH..WHERE THE EARTH STILL CALL US HOME...LET US FIND RESTORATION..A WORLD WITH A NEW ORDER..BEFORE WE CLOSE LIFE FOREVER...WITH NO CELEBRATION OR HOPE FOR DA FUTURE..OUR LIFE DEPENDS ON RESOLUTION..WHERE THE SOUL MATES IT'S KINGDOM..WHERE YOUR THE THORNS..LOOKING DOWN ON US ALL..PROPHECIES WRITTEN..PEACE..CREATE...AKA.. SHEILA T JORDAN

WHICH JUNGLE LIVES HUMAN

IN THE DISMAL CLOUDY DAY..WHERE SKIES ARE REACHING OUT TO SUBSTITUTE WHAT LIES IN DISTRESS BY INHABITENCE..WHERE DA LIFE OF JUNGLE IS RUNNING FREE WITHOUT A NOTION 2 CAPTURE WHAT'S ABLE 2 ENJOY THE NATURE..TO ABSORB YOUR INNERMOST ANIMAL INSTINCTS..WITHOUT THE WORLD ..TAKING OVER IN CAPTIVITY..BEING REPLACED BY..ELEMENTS OF GENERIC LIFEFORMS AND HUMAN BONDAGE ..BY WAY OF ATTACK..WHERE MAN'S LAST MISTAKE..IS TO CONQUER..ANIMAL KINGDOM AND PAY WHOSE IN CHARGE..BREAKING A WILDLIFE CONSERVATION...GIFTED BY THE HIGHER POWERS THAT BROUGHT FORTH ON THIS PLANET..SOME BODILY SPIRITS TO ROAR..IDENTIFIING WHO WAS THE MASTER OF HIS KINGDOM..WHAT DRAWS U CLOSE..TO UNTANGLE WHAT MAN AND HIS CORRUPTED NATURE 2 CONTROL THE WILDERNESS...TAKES AIM...LETTING THE DEMONS WHICH EATS CIVILIZATION ACROSS THE FIELDS OF DREAMS..WHERE ANGELS HAVE WINGS...DOVES BECOME YOUR GUIDING FORCE AND THE COMMON MAN SHALL DIVE AND CARRY OUT HIS DEVISTATION..DESTROY LOVE...THE ONE THING MAN KNOWS NO COMMUNICATION...I WRITE THIS BRIEF CHAPTER OF INHABITENCE..BECAUSE.. IT'S JUST LIKE MAN IN LIFE..WHAT GIVES THEM THE POWERS TO ACHIEVE A WORLD THAT WAS A PARIDISE..KNOWS THAT IT'S CAPABLE TO CLAIM WHATS BEEN ASSIGNED...ALSO..WHAT'S BEEN GIVEN AS SCRIPTURE..THE WAYS 2 ENJOY WHAT GOD HAS PLANNED...ALTHOUGH "YOU" AS THE WRITTEN DOCUMENT..WHAT FORETOLD THIS SYSTEM...IS DESTINCT INSIDE YOU 2 MAKE A LIFE OF VURTUE AND BESTOW YOUR WISDOM AND WELL BEING ..TO CLAIM YOUR VICTORIES...I LOVE WHEN A MAN CAN OBSORB KNOWLEDGE IN ORDER TO CONQUER ..DESTROY FAILURE..TO GO AT ANY HEIGHTS TO GAIN FORTUNE...WHAT GIVES HIM THE AIR TO LEVEL..WHAT'S UNBALANCED...TO GO AND ACHIEVE THAT MOMENT OF FEAR...WHERE BELIEF IS PLAYIN GAMES WITH HIS SUCCESS..I DREAM ABOUT THE PARIDISE WRIITEN..SPOKEN ON WHEN EVERY DOWNFALL PROCEEDS 2 BE A TARGET 2 EMERGE FEELING POWERS OF HUMAN..THE COMMON MAN..EXCEPTED BY THE GOOD OF THE LAND AND NOT GETTIN EVEN..WHEN THINGS DON'T GO YOUR WAY IN LIFE..THE ACCUSED ATTACKER WAITS IN DA WINGS AND FORCES HIMSELF 2 BE CHALLENGED..ATTEMPTING 2 FEEL DEFENSELESS..BUT YET DESTRUCTIVE...A LIFE IS PRECIOUS..DELICATE..LIKE A FLORAL ARRANGEMENT TO HAND YOUR WIFE..DAUGHTER..LADY..MOTHER..IN THE JUNGLE OF WARFIRE AMONGST OUR LIFEFORM..I DISCOVERED..THAT THE ONLY THING TO DO IS TO CHANGE THE WAYS TOXIC AMMUNITY..WHICH HAS TAKEN OVER NATURE BY STORM AND DECAYED THE LOVE AND WIPED AWAY OUR DECENT HABITAT..WHERE ANIMAL INSTINCTS HAS SWITCHED HIS CALL..2 BEHAVE LIKE A REAL MAN AND GIVE HIS QUEEN REAL PASSIONATE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND APPRECIATE HER APPROACH 2 EXAMPLE HIS KINGDOM..BEING QUEEN..WHERE PASSION KNOW NO HATRED.. UNTIL ANIMAL MAGNETISM BECOMES THE ROAR OF HIS OWN MEANS 2 POWER..WHAT MAKES HIM ACT THE SAME...VIOLENT..I CAN DREAM...AS LEAST 4 NOW...WHAT ABOUT ETERNITY... WHICH ONE IS MY KING...PEACE..CREATE..AKA..SHEILA

POEM

I'M THE FLOOR..WHERE I POUNCE..SWING MY ARMS AND SHAKE MY ASS..I GAVE U A STEP..U CAME BACK WITH AN OUNCE OF SWEAT..YOU GRABBED MY HAND AND I RASIED THE ROOF...COMMENCED TO KICK MY HEALS..JUMPED UP IN DA AIR SAYIN...CAN U DIG ME NOW..DO U FEEL MY VIBE..TOUCH MY HEART...I 'VE BEEN LIFTED...REBORN IN2 YOUR FEET..CLAPPIN SINGING...DANCIN..LIKE GOD GAVE ME SPIRITUAL ENLIGHTMENT... I PRAISED..I GLORIFIED..I THANKED MY SURROUNDINGS..I STOPPED..I THOUGHT ..4 A MINUTE...ASKED THE LORD TO BLESS ME FOR TIME LIVED FOR AS LONG AS I HAVE THE CONTROL OF..FOR WHICH..IF THIS WASN'T HIS DOING...I WOULD NEVER UNDERSTAND WISDOM..2 KNOW THE TRUTH..BLESSED HAVING BEEN A MOTHER...DAUGHTER...COOK..HAIRSTYLIST...CHILD PROVIDER..AN AIDE FOR THE AGED.. THIS HAS TRULY BEEN ..A GIFT..NO MATTER HOW HARD IT'S BEEN...THE CYCLE ..WILL REPEAT ITSELF..LIFE'S TURNING POINTS...HOLDING ON FOR MORE BLESSINGS...DON'T EVER TAKE LIFE FOR GRANTED...ENJOY IT 2 DA FULLEST...BECOME THE PRIZE WINNING PERSON...GIVE BAC..INSTEAD OF LOOKING AT YOUR OWN PRIORITIES...IT'S A BIG WORLD OUT THERE...A PLACE ..WHERE IF U JUST TAKE TIME AND LOOK...YOU'RE WANTED..NEEDED...LOVED..WORSHIPPED AND ADORED...I KNOW...I FOUND OUT...THIS WEEKEND..GOD BLESS U AND YOURS..SMILING..:::*_*:::..THANKS'S NICK..I I'M SINGLE

DA WEEKEND APPROVES ME

GOODEVENING...WELL AS A START..MY WEEKEND WAS THE BEST EVER...LAST NIGHT I GOT A CHANCE TO SPEND EQUAL TIME WITH MY PEOPLE..MY GRANDDAUGHTER'S EMANI'S BIRTHDAY..MY DAUGHTER SHATIKA..HUSBAND IAN AND THE FAMILY ALL CELEBRATED AT SKATE 22 IN SCOTCH PLAINS NJ..WHERE THEY LIVE..WELL AT FIRST I WASN'T GOING TO SKATE..BUT THAT MUSIC SOUNDED SO GOOD ..I COULDN'T RESIST..THE PLACE WAS ENORMOUS..THE OWNERS ARE FRIENDS OF MY DAUGHTER..SO WE ALL GOT 2 SKATE FOR FREE..I WASN'T SKATING A LOT DUE TO THE CAMERAWORK I WAS DOI..WE TAPED PART OF THE BIRTHDAY..WHERE I WAS IN CHARGE..UNTIL THEY PUT ON ELECTRIC SLIDE AND BEYONCE'S IF I WAS A BOY..YOU SHOULDA PUTTA RING ON IT.BY BEYONCE'..THAT GOT ME MOVIN...I FELL ONE TIME..LOL..BUT ALL AND ALL..THE CROWD..HER FRIENDS..PEOPLE AT THE RING WAS FABULOUS..WE HAD A BALL...I HAD TO BE CAREFUL..CONSIDERING WE HAD 2 GET BAC TO QUEENS FOR MY SHOW.. IT ENDED AT 7:00P.M...WE ARRIVED AT 3..STARTED SETTING UP THE TABLES IN OUR CUBE..I STARTED DECORATING THE TABLES..THE CAKE..BALLOONS...DRINKS NAPKINS..ETC..AS SOON AS WE FINISHED IT STARTED EXACTLY 4:00..WHEN THAT MUSIC CAME ON..THE BEAT BROUGHT ME BAC TO WHEN I USE TO ROLLERSKATE..THE MASCOT WAS ON TIME..HE GOT THOSE KIDS IN LINE..HIS WAS HOOOOOO..SO DAMN GOOD..I STAYED WITH HIS DAD..WHILE THE REST OF THE KIDS WERE INSTRUCTED WHAT TO DO WITH HIM...I'M TELLING YA..I'M GOING BACK..THAT'S RIGHT..I LOVED IT...I MET PEOPLE THAT TRAVELED AS FAR AS BROOLYN...AND EVEN QUEENS..I WAS SHOCKED..SO ALL WORKED OUT WELL..WHEN IT ENDED...THE KIDS ..PARENTS..ALL WERE COMING TOGETHER..LAUGHING..SHAKING HANDS..YA KNOW ACTING LIKE THEY HAD BEEN FRIENDS FOR YEARS...THE ATMOSPHERE WAS SO WARM AND INVITING..I DIDN'T WANNA LEAVE..WE GOT TO THEIR HOUSE...WHERE I TOOK A SHOWER..CHANGED AND TIKI FED THE KIDS..GOT READY TO TAKE US BAC TO QUEENS..WHERE SHE LEFT THIS MORNING..SHE GOT TO GO TO MY SHOW WITH ME..WHERE SHE WAS SO PROUD..MET A THE OWNER GARY.. HIS WIFE..SON..AND COUSIN..IT WASN'T AS CROWDED AS LAST WEEK..BUT IT WAS A GOOD SHOW..I WAS BEAT FROM GETTING UP SO EARLY FRIDAY..LEAVING FOR JERSEY..THAN THE PARTY...ARRIVING TO HER HOUSE AND THEN THE CLUB..I HAD A WONDERFUL WEEKEND..MY MOM MISSED ME..SHE WAS WAITING UP UNTIL 1:00AM..SUNDAY MORNING..WHERE WE GOT 2 QUEENS AT 9:30.. DROPPED THE KIDS OFF AND KEPTED ON TO THE SHOW..I AM TRULY BLESSED TO HAVE FAMILY..MY MOM..GRAND..I THANK GOD ALL THE TIME..FRIENDS..WHICH I KEEP FEW..AND MOST OF ALL..MY HEALTH..HAPPINESS FOR DAYS 2COME..THANK YOU FOR SHARING MY WEEKEND EVENTS...AND FOR THE BLOGGERS I DIDN'T WISH A HAPPY HOLIDAY..SORRY FOR THE DELAY..HOPE IT TURNED OUT GOOD FOR YA...GOD BLESS YOU...CREATE

BIRTHDAY ...DA MEMORY OF..ANTHONY BERRY

I JUST WANNA GIVE THANKS TO THE HIGHER POWERS THAT BE..HE HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE EMBRACE FROM FLESH THAT HELPED BIRTH OUR CHILDREN..TAMARA AND NATHANIEL..THESE CHILDREN HAVE BEEN THROUGH HELL..I REALIZE NOW..HOW MUCH THEY NEEDED THEIR FATHER'S SUPPORT..IN THE END..GUNFIRE TOOK HIS LIFE ..WHERE HE WAS MISSING FOR A WEEK..THE MOTHER CALLED ASKING WHEN HAD I HEARD FROM ANTHONY LAST..I REPLIED..MOM BERRY.. I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM HIM SINCE THE LAST TIME HE CAN OVER AND BROUGHT THE KIDS TO SEE YOU..WHEN WAS THAT..I THINK 2 WEEKS AGO...WELL..SHE REPLIED ..NOBODY'S HEARD FROM HIM AND I'M SCARED SHEILA..HIS JOB CALLED HEAR LOOKING FOR HIM..ARE THE KIDS OK..U SEE HIS MOM HAD A STROKE..SO HIS SISTERS WAS TAKING CARE OF HER..SHE HAD A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN...THEY THOUGHT ABOUT (MAN)NATHAN AND TAMMY...WHICH..AT THE TIME WAS 12 AND 10 YEARS OLD...A WEEK WENT BY..WHEN WE GOT THE PHONE CALL..WHERE I ANSWERED THE PHONE...SHEILA..IS THAT YOU..I ANSWERED ..WHO IS IT..MOM BERRY..IS THAT YOU..YES..SHE WAS SCARED ME..SOUNDED SO SAD..I REPLIED..ARE U OK..AND THAT'S WHEN SHE GAVE US THE BAD NEWS...SHE REPLED..ANTHONY'S GONE..WHAT DO U MEAN?? I ASKED.HE'S GONE..DID HE GET LOCKED UP...SHE ANSWERED NO..SHEILA THEY FOUND ANTHONY IN WATER...LAYIN FACE DOWN..HE'S DEAD...I DROPPED THE PHONE..SCREAMED ALL THROW THE HOUSE ..WHERE ALL THE KIDS CAME RUNNING..HAD TO GET THEM PREPARED..WHEN I DID..MY DAUGHTER TAMMY FAINTED AT THE STAIRCASE AND WENT DOWN HEAD FIRST TO THE BASEMENT..WE HAD TO RUN AND GET HER ..THEN NATHAN...WELL..HE WENT TO THE FUNERAL..TOOK A LOOK AT HIS DAD AND HE WAS QUIET FOR WEEKS...HAD TO TAKE HIM TO THE HOSPITAL ..WHERE THE DOCTOR'S SAID..AND I QUOTE;U GOTTA WATCH HIM..HE'S HOLDIN EVERYTHING INSIDE..THATS BAD..AFTER THAT..HE WAS SELLING DRUGS..AT14..STOLE AT THE HOUSE..WENT IN DRUG PROGRAMS..WHERE HE WAS SPILTING..SNEAKIN IN THE HOUSE THROUGH THE WINDOW..WHERE MY BROTHER SAID..IF U KEEP LIVING THAT PROGRAM ..I'M GONNA TELL THEM TO PUT U IN JAIL..WELL .DIDN'T HAVE2 ...HE ROBBED OUR NEIGHBORS..AS A RESULT.. 2YEARS UPSTATE..THIS REALLY GAVE ME WAKE UP CALL..TOOK PART IN MEETINGS..MADE SURE I WAS THERE UPSTATE..WHERE HE GOT TO LEARNS ELECTRONICS...HOME IMPROVEMENT..NOW HE'S LICENSED NOW AFTER 7 YEARS OF GIVEN ME HELL..ALL OVER BEING MAD AT HIS FATHER FOR A DEBT HE OWED..CRACK..PAYMENT..THIS DAY ..I WANNA SAY..TO GOD AND HIM...YOUR CHILDREN HAVE EXILED..YOUR SON WENT BAC TO SCHOOL AT NIGHT..YOUR DAUGHTER THAT'S YOUR TWIN..SHE'S PASSED EXILED..SHE FOUND CHRIST..GOT A GOOD MAN..IN THE CHURCH..WHERE THEY BOTH WERE BAPTIZED..YOUR GRANDKIDS..HER GIRLFRIENDS..MY NEIGHBORS DAUGHTERS..WHO YOU SON ROBBED...THE LORD IS MERCIFUL..EVERYTHING WORKED OUT OK...YOUR CHILDREN ARE DOING JUST FINE...HAPPY BIRTHDAY...IDIDN'T FORGET U...GOD BLESS U..I KNOW YOU BEEN JUDGED..IN HEAVEN..FOR YOUR ACTS ON EARTH..SO BE IT..IN LIFE U WAS A MAN OF GOD..U BETRAYED..HE FORGIVES...THAT'S HOW WONDERFUL HE IS..I AM OK..HE HAS HIS HANDS ON US..DEAD AND ALIVE..EITHER WAY..U PAY..BUT YOUR STILL LOVED..I'M HUMBLE ANTHONY..PEACE ON EARTH..FROM..SHEILA