TIME TOOK IT'S TOIL ON GOODBYE

GOODMORNING..

the last time i was here..

I left with tears running down my face the LIFE I have chosen..becoming a poet..w/longevity..

holding on 2 a wonderful career..a happy future..BUT

what became so crucial..so hard to except..that I just gave up on making this work..Yes..I was hurt..felt abandon..I saw a world that came tumbling down all around me...wasn't looking on the outside of principles..holding back the tears..fighting with myself..the pain was eating me up inside..tearing me up. feeling miserable about why..after all these years..there was departure..and why must we let it go...LAST TUES..Jan.19..MY sweet..angel of mercy..my gold..

my heart of 98 YEARS left this EARTH...mom...the best friend anyone could ever have..she was in my care..I gave up my Job,because I didn't wanna leave her in the mornings, come home at night .from a long day of work.. go into her bedroom..say hi mom..where..she would be telling me..how the food..meals on wheels was very distasteful..refuse to eat..notice the increase of weight dropping...told myself..it is not gonna work..all my family members was working..my daughter upstairs..son..my brother worked at night...someone had to b with her..on MOTHER'S DAY..her sister..

MY AUNT KITTY passed..

so my boss gave me off so that I could go to the funeral..when I came back..went to work..I walked in to scandal ..involving me with another co-worker..I WAS SO outta it...I broke in the kitchen..where my girlfriend who worked across at starbust came to pull me outta the kitchen..ask me to calm down, where I told her..i was leaving..this was the turning of my life...everything got on my nerves..I drop my apron..she tried to convinced me to stay..where I turned and gave her my love, said..

my mother needs me now..the hell with this shit..and thats how..it was for all of 4 months..

I GAVE MY TIME ..LOVE AND DEVOTION TO MY MOM..the job wanted to have a sit in..on the matter..so I went back for the meeting..questions were ask about what happen..things I knew..i wouldn't give any information..I knew of the affair with management..the young lady 25..was the manager..he was the cook..pressure robbed me day and night..my skills WERE LACKING..went on for months, going along with them..feeling like a fool..with no direction or pride in myself...for this..

I left Host marriots Services..

they called me back...my Girlfriend Debbie in the picture above, the cook turned against her ..because she squealed on the both..as U can see in our happier moment as friends..so in turn..

I Gave the following months to my mother...left it all behind..

her body became fragile..

dropped about 60 pounds throughout the months..she had CANCER..the reality sank in..

I had to be with her..when she fell one morning over my head..where I stay in the basement..

the sound went all through my body..her room was above mines..I ran as fast as I could.. upstairs..where my brother said was that mother..where he commence to open her bedroom door..she use to keep it locked for her privacy...when he got it open ..my mother was on the floor..with her head on the bed and her body, legs were turned another way..he lifted her up..where trauma emerged within , I cried , held her close and said..don't worry mom..were here for u..they found a blood clot in her leg..plus...the family had to be called to a meeting..where the doctor's diagnosed her as Having..Dementia..she is very sick..preparations are in order for her days ahead, so ..as u can see..it is now 2010,JAN 29..MY mom was laid to rest...this past Monday..it's been very complicating to say the lest..I am working on going back to work..fulfilling the dreams ,,she would want me to and..keeping close friendships..even if it's been hard to swallow..my attitude wasn'i w/it ..that was trauma 4 me as well..But, in all ..I am thankful.for the many people that came to her funeral..neighbors,..out of town friends who my brother and I went to school with from..SC.FLORIDA..VA..COUSINS..AUNTS..my uncle adolph wasn't able to attend..my AUNT..EUNICE AS WELL wasn't there..she's in a nursing home..and my uncle ..who lives in Boston was retired ..91..sick w/ diabetes..aide provided..(him and my departed AUNT that died

ON MOTHER'S DAY were both..in business for the faithfully departed..mortisans..they buried most our family members..now..aunt Eunice and uncle Adolphus..uncle JACK are the only ones left out of thirteen children raised.. Grandma..(Mattie Burnett) Bullock... NOW..my mother is with her mom..brothers & sister's ..may u all rest together in peace...I love you...thanks for listening world...PEACE..sincerely..Ms SHEILA T Jordan..CREATE

FRIENDSHIP.>.gotta watch who

is vs who is..>>ur back being watched

and now u know

WORDSONG..how I was 'GRIEVING

NOW I am BACK..

IT AIN'T over UNTIL God

sends a MESSAGE

I am cured..

back to work..{{c{*_}}}?